By Kimberly Cunningham
It was never the loneliness that bothered the woman’s subtle soul. Wandering in uncertainity is what kept her disturbed. Knowing all was easier than not knowing any of it. No decisions can be made from ignorance. Partial exposure would show raw pain and she did not want that. Instead, this lovely lady stayed sitting poised quietly in a round corner.
Time was of no measure for her. It was actions that determined each day’s hours. The carefully calculated life she carved out didn’t leave much room for add ons. Neediness was not something she was taught or shown. Survival without love is what she knew. Instinct was to just move with no matter given to the way to get there.
It was when her time tolled on her life that she had to go look in a mirror of reality. She stood alone in a room of four walls, talking in echoes,
whispering in screams. The ferocious monster that she birthed and raised was coming after her. It did not look so pretty like it did when she was the keeper of this atrocity. As she tries to leave this ugliness behind, the walls begin to topple.
Power and success took her to the top, but they left her stranded there alone. Not another being is standing next to her. The ladder she climbed is now being used by someone else. Down below is a pit of mud of which the bottom is unknown. She will have to descend by slowly crawling along and searching for an exit out of this mess.
Squinting to see over to the dim horizon, she sees movement. Fuzzy shapes and dull images dance around on the crest of the hill just above the deep valley. Shouting over to the objects, she cries, ” do you see me, can you help me, I am stuck here?” No answer comes but she sees a sharper image jump up and down. ” Do you hear me?” As she finishes her request she sees a form appearing to be a person.
Focusing directly ahead, she sees a woman hold up a sign. ” What does it say?” she yells to her. ” You have to read it to get help,” the stranger says. ” I cannot read it unless you come closer,” laments the stranded one. ” Once you find a way, you will see things clearly and I will be here for you. Seek me any way you can, travel unknown paths to get here and you can have message.”
Suddenly this sad woman remembered the determination she had packed in her bag just in case. ” I will slide down to the mud, crawl through it to the foot of that hill and then pull myself to the top!”
Throughout her trip she fell down, stumbled, got hurt and stood back up every time. Determination stayed with her. Struggling once more, she hoisted herself to the top and greeted the unknown lady. Immediately a sign containing one word… “hope” was passed to her. “Sometimes you have to make your way because of others are holding hope for you. It is you now that has this sign to show to someone who is stuck and struggling. Hold this hope with all that you have and all that you are. Never again will you be despondent and alone.”